Infertility Black Magic

WITCH FERTILITY PHOTO

WITCH FERTILITY PHOTO

Even the headmistress witch, Cordelia, in American Horror Story: Coven is not powerful enough to beat infertility.  When her conventional fertility treatments are not successful in Episode 2, she resorts to black magic. However, her spells are not sufficient because she is still not pregnant.  In Episode 3 her doctor says that she simply can not have a baby, and he wishes that he had a magic wand to wave.  So instead she turns to the New Orleans Voodoo Queen for additional magic.  But the Voodoo Queen has a vendetta with Cordelia’s mother and refuses to avail Cordelia of her fertility, goat sacrificing know-how.  There is still time for Cordelia to become pregnant in future episodes.   Although this being  American Horror Story, there is a good chance that she will give birth to a monster.

A BABY OR BUST

 

Mother of George Photo

Mother of George Photo

Having a baby calls for desperate measures.  In the movie Mother of George a Nigerian couple are unable to conceive.  The husband’s mother is desperate for a male grandchild to carry on the family name.  My husband also wanted me to have a male child to carry on his unbroken male lineage that went back eight generations to a famous Jewish scholar called the Vilna Gaon.  My husband’s parents were in their 90’s and anxiously awaiting for their grandchild.  The mother-in-law in Mother of George proposed the solution of having her younger son stand in for her older son to impregnate his wife.  Luckily my husband was an only child so he had no brothers to impregnate me  when I could not get pregnant.  Otherwise my mother-in-law would have been lining them up.

Admission to Motherhood

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

In the new  movie “Admission” Tina Fey wishes that she had raised a child.  Then she finds a boy who may be the one she gave up for adoption.  She helps him get into Princeton where she is an admission counselor.  Before this move, Tina Fey got to star in a different one called  “Baby Mama,” about a single mom who hires a surrogate.  Who knows next she may be in a movie where she gets to be an egg donor who  falls in love with a sperm donor.  Infertility has come into the movie mainstream! 

Russia Halts U.S. Adoptions

New York Times Russian Adoption Photo

Russia officially halts all U.S. adoptions.  Putin just signed it into law.  All those hopeful Russian children and waiting American parents are heartbroken.  Some of those Americans will have gone through failed infertility treatments as well, and now they will lose their Russian child who would have been their miracle baby.  46 nearly finalized adoptions are halted and one almost mother, Kim Summers, is left with only a photo of herself holding her baby that will remain behind in Russia.  It is unfortunate that political differences have made pawns of the children.

Princess Kate Seeks Fertility

 

Kate and William Seek Fertility Photo

Princess Kate and Prince William seek fertility treatments to birth the next royal. Royalty is no stranger to infertility. Bloody Mary, the oldest daughter of Henry the VIII called “Bloody” because of her penchant for burning Protestants at the stake, had multiple hysterical pregnancies that were all in her head. Napoleon divorced Josephine because of her inability to bear him a child. Her failed infertility treatments consisted of leeches, laxatives and dousing in spring water. IVF is more effective but just as painful. Hopefully William won’t divorce Kate for failure to bear. But if the problem is him, sperm donation won’t be an option because of the need to continue the royal line.

Sandy Storm Freezing and Egg Freezing

 

Storm Sandy Generator Photo

I lost power in Hurricane Sandy the day after the storm.  Con Ed cut my power to fix wires and then waited a week and a half to reinstate it. I regularly fought for an outlet in Starbucks to charge my phone and computer. I got sick of sitting at home in the dark and freezing. Finally, I bought a generator off a truck that an entrepreneurial guy sold for a two hundred dollar mark up. Everyday I waited over an hour in gas lines in order to buy the fuel to power the generator.  While shivering at home, I learned that the ASRM just approved freezing your eggs for the future. The procedure would no longer be experimental. I wished that I had known about the technique.  As soon as I got divorced in my 30’s, I would have run to the freezer to bank my eggs for the next Mr. Right. 

BOOK SIGNING AT MANHASSET BARNES AND NOBLE

 

Barnes and Noble Manhasset Photo

I will be doing a book signing for Grade A Baby Eggs: An Infertility Memoir at Barnes and Noble of Manhasset on Thursday October 4th at 7 pm.  For my presentation I will need to load the car with my projector, movie screen and Silly Putty giveaway eggs.  Once again I must try to pack the house.  I will dig up any high school friends that still live on Long Island.  My mother will scrounge her building and round up the elderly residents at the card room, the dining hall and the physical therapist.  As long as they are mobile and can get through the doorway of the Barnes and Noble with a walker or a wheelchair, they can participate.  Everyone else is welcome to attend as well.

Gone Girl Fights For Fertility

Gone Girl Photo

Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn  features two generations of infertility.  Amazing Amy, the main character, was the miracle baby after her parents had 5 miscarriages and 2 stillbirths of girls all named Hope.  Then the grown up Amy visited the fertility clinic with her husband Nick. He got to watch the 90’s porno flicks to produce his sperm and then he froze his creation at the clinic.  My husband also was a two generation infertile.  His parents had him in their 40’s after many miscarriages because of his mother’s previously undiagnosed polyp. Then he married me whose eggs were too old to work properly.  

Hyperstimulation Risk Increases Pregnancy Rates

Hyperstimulation Risk Photo

High doses of hormones for IVF treatment can cause hyperstimulation and result in death. In Europe and Japan lower doses of hormones are used to avoid hyperstimulation, but the pregnancy rates may go down.  The New York Times reported in their article “High Doses of Hormones Faulted in Fertility Care” that the US keeps the hormone levels high in order to have increased hospital success rates and remain competitive in the lucrative infertility market.  The best solution would be to become pregnant but to stay alive in the process.

HUNTINGTON BOOK REVUE SIGNING

 

Huntington Book Revue Photo

I will be signing  my book Grade A Baby Eggs at the Huntington Book Revue tomorrow Thursday Sept. 30 at 7 pm. The Book Revue has featured presidents, Bill Clinton and Jimmy Carter, actresses, Whoppi Goldberg, Marlo Thomas etc. athletes, Darryl Strawberry, and numerous other famous people.  I am not a celebrity, but I am expected to bring in the crowds. So I will have to dig deep.  First I contacted Huntington possibilities.  I located an old  Huntington friend  who my cousin found her for me on Facebook since they had graduated in the same high school class. I will look forward to reconnecting with her.  Then I found my own Long Island high school friends and relatives.  I need to keep bringing in the bodies.  So everyone is invited and as long as you know someone who is still breathing bring them along!